she doesn't like it when we mention the religion club.

she's all denials when we talk about her being the good girl, or the cute one, or the sweetest one.

she always sighs about being the early bird and always getting there on time, which basically means waiting for at least half an hour before anybody else shows up.

i don't know if it's still there, but her friendster profile had a quote from that chloe character in smallville. something about being somebody's dream girl masquerading as his best friend. she quoted that, not because she had a specific boy in mind, but because she felt that that's how everybody sees her. just good old reliable her whom everybody takes for granted.

it worries her, i know, that people think of her as this paragon of virtue and that they might never get beyond that, never really get to know her, never think about the possibility that she could feel pain and anger and passion and disappointment and that she could even, yes, succumb to the temptations of being evil as much as the next person.

and so, being the good, kind friend that i am, and because it is her birthday, i will list down all the bad and bitchy things she has ever done. you know, to prove that she's made of flesh and blood, and not just of sugar and fluff and downy baby unicorns on pillowy clouds.

you ready, rods?

1. religion club.

i know you're getting sick of us bringing this up every now and then, and that you think we do it because it amuses us to do so, but being associated with it, however briefly, is also possibly the most heinous thing you have ever done and could ever do your entire life.

and i do not say this as a sacrilegious person. it's just that, how should i put this? i don't think arrogance should have a place in anything associated with religion.

2. um, let's see...

uh...

oh...

i'm sorry, that's all i have.

you just have to face it, you ARE the kindest, most generous, most gracious person alive.

and i know that's a bummer, but when you think about how you've saved me (and all those who are lucky enough to have you in their lives) from writing off the whole human race time and time again, well, there are worse things to be, right?

like, say, being the moderator of the religion club.

you have to agree, that would suck.

p.s.

i thought about mentioning that time when you gave in and joined us in eating those hotdog buns that we pilfered borrowed from the caf after CAT, but i used to buy hotdog sandwiches from that caf and only asked for the wieners. they never gave me refunds for all those buns i didn't take, so really that bread we ate was all paid for by me. in a roundabout way.

p.p.s.

i just realized that, what do you know, march 17 is also st. patrick's day. cheers!